Timber! (S03, E05)
In which we’re going down and yelling Bigfoot!
We open on a brother and sister, John and Samantha, driving their logging truck to the mill. We know that’s how they’re related because John calls Samantha “little sister”, which is a completely normal thing to say to someone who already knows that information.
They stop off at a petrol station, where they cross paths with local bully McEwan who’s played by Halloween 5 and 6, and Due South actor Beau Starr. McEwan is running a dodgy lumberjack union, where the only interest it serves is his. John’s refused to join, which earns him a beating and gets his truck torched.
Samantha heads to LA to hire the A-Team, meeting Hannibal as a paper seller. He tests her by giving her too much change, which she returns. Samantha explains the situation to the boys, adding that no-one is brave enough to stand up to McEwan in court and the others believe his lies that he can get better prices for their lumber. If the team can help, she’ll pay them from their profits.
Face goes to break our Murdock, this time pretending to be from the government and trying to ensure the Captain doesn’t reveal and state secrets. The nurse tells him that they just ignore whatever Murdock says, hardly the most compassionate approach to mental illness.
On their way to Samantha’s cabin, the team stop off at the petrol station to gather supplies. McEwan’s men are quick on the uptake and soon arrive to warn Hannibal away. A fight breaks out, which the lumberjacks win until BA arrives and knocks a few out. This turns the tide enough for Hannibal, Murdock and Face to finish off the others.
At the cabin in the woods, the team also meet Samantha’s son Billy who of course bonds with BA. Apparently, she’s not seen him this happy “since his father died”, which makes you wonder why that made him so happy and if the team should be more worried about Billy than McEwan.
Speaking of, McEwan visits the team to welcome them to the area and check their union cards. When they refuse to back down, he reminds John that unless he makes some money soon his house will be repossessed. This time though, McEwan is happy to leave without a fight.
While Face and Samantha go out to scam a new truck to deliver the logs, the rest of the team start work felling trees through a combination of stock footage and montage.
Although Murdock’s a little distracted as he’s found a paper offering a $15 reward for a picture of bigfoot, he spots the glint of binoculars in the woods and alerts Hannibal. McEwan’s men are back to attack the team at work, setting off charges that destroy the winch and knock a tree down on Murdock.
After getting Billy to safety, BA returns and manages to lift the tree off the Captain with Hannibal’s help. He’s injured but ok to keep helping, unlike the winch which is irreparable and stops them moving the logs onto the new truck. Fortunately, Hannibal knows a man who can lend them the money for a new one.
Over at McEwan’s office, he’s busy counting the union dues when a chainsaw begins cutting a hole through his wall. BA steps inside, flanked by the team wielding their guns. Face retrieves enough cash from McEwan and his men to cover the winch.
With the timber loaded onto the truck, Hannibal orders John to stay at the cabin to protect Samantha and Billy incase McEwan comes for them. With BA behind the wheel and Face and Murdock on top, the team set off for the mill.
They don’t get far before running into a roadblock, which Murdock splits apart with a well-aimed explosive round. BA drives through the middle as the cars scramble to chase after the truck. The gang and the team exchange gunfire, until another heavy explosive round flips the car over. Despite its mangled condition, all occupants escaped unharmed.
Bursting through the mill gates, the team present their delivery to the owner. Turns out he’s on the union’s side though and McEwan’s men are already there to stop them. They tie the team up in a warehouse while they wait for their boss to arrive.
BA manages to pull the post he’s roped to out of the ground and the team reckon they have an hour to prepare before McEwan arrives. Thankfully, a forklift truck, propane canister and box of dynamite provide some inspiration for a montage.
Right on cue, the team burst out of the warehouse door in a modified forklift, shooting lengths of timber from two propane cannons and throwing sticks of dynamite at the bad guys. The villains scatter and try to escape but find their cars flipped over in the explosions. McEwan attempts one last swing at Hannibal but misses and gets knocked out into a pile of sawdust.
Back at the cabin, all is well for the family. Face has arranged a deal that’ll pay over the odds for the timber and even gets a kiss on the cheek and a picnic basket from Samantha. BA heads off to help fix Billy’s bike, while Hannibal explains to Murdock that they have to leave even if he hasn’t found Bigfoot yet.
Just then, a bell rings and Murdock is thrilled his trap has worked. The team gather round to take a picture of Bigfoot, only to find BA hanging from a tree upside down. Freeze-frame!
Let’s wrap up with a few key questions.
Does Hannibal wear a disguise?
Yes – he’s a newspaper vendor to meet their client and test her honesty.
Does BA get on a plane?
No – but he gets to drive a big logging truck.
Should someone be dead?
Yes. The car flip after the roadblock is a tough one, leaving the car crumpled.
Timber! is a pretty standard but still entertaining episode of The A-Team. Like the previous episode, it puts the boys in a new role – this time as lumberjacks rather than firemen. As usual, they’re up against a bigger bully trying to shut down a small business that won’t pay his demands.
Beau Starr makes a great villain for the team, mixing a genuine menace with enough charm that you can believe why his men follow him. Like all men with power, he seems to have lost sight of what’s right and his happy to destroy property and endanger lives for financial gain. The team are all on fire, as usual, perhaps at their most natural with each other by this point of the series.