In which the A-Team scrounge and build their own hydration station.

Three injured veterans are fixing up a hotel for its upcoming launch, but all is not well. They’re visited by Gaines, the local big landowner, who offers to buy their land – reminding them its not easy to run a hotel without the water he controls. The group refuse the offer and Gaines exits, sending in his goons to beat them up and trash the place.

The men go to recover in the VA hospital, where they meet Murdock. Here, we see their war injuries, one in a wheelchair, one lost an arm and the last lost a leg. They’re not keen on hiring the A-Team as they want to solve the problem themselves. The orderly pushing the wheelchair tells them they’re too stubborn, revealing himself to be Hannibal in what might be his best disguise – it had me fooled for a while.

Oddly during this scene, Murdock mentions he got Princess Diana and Charles together and hasn’t had any complaints…

The team take the case and meet up at a café by the hotel, owned by the vet’s friend Amanda. We learn that Gaines is stopping any water getting to the hotel, which actually sits on land that had the only fresh water in the area beneath it. Only problem is, the veterans are too poor to buy the equipment to drill for it.

Gaines and henchman interrupt the café meeting. Asking who they are, Hannibal replies “the Aquamaniac” for a good laugh. There are a few threats until Hannibal punches Gaines and a fight breaks out which the team win easily, even shooting the goons’ hats off as they leave.

For his revenge, Gaines has his stooges block the next water truck from reaching town and begins to set small fires around the town – even leaving smug notes next to them. Next he shoots out the van’s window and tyre (clearly setting himself up for trouble later). 

Face and Murdock head to the water pumping station and scam their way into turning off Gaines’ water. They regroup with Hannibal and BA to pay Gaines a visit, presenting their offer – $3,000 for his land. Apparently, this is the price his grandfather scammed the Native Americans out of the land for. There’s another fight, which the team win easily again and BA gets his own back by shooting up the place.

Gaines proves hard to scare off though, as he makes it clear he’s not backing down and he will end up with the water rights and the hotel land. The plan needs to evolve, starting with stealing some water drilling equipment from Gaines’ warehouse. That night, Face picks the locks and the team return with a haul of hoses.

The next day, the power of montage helps the BA and Murdock build a drill, despite at one point both using spanners to hammer pipes into place. Meanwhile, Face is making a move on café owner Amanda. He sells her the romance of why the team stays together when they’d be safer splitting up and hiding: “apart we are misfits, together we’re special”. Just as he’s about the close the sale, he calls her Wanda and it’s game over man.

The drill’s soon ready and powered by the van’s engine strikes water successfully. Gaines’ men are watching are report back to him. He decides enough is enough and gathers his squad to lead an attack on the hotel. They douse the walls in gasoline, but are photographed by Amy and defeated when the team and veterans surprise them by firing high-pressure water from hoses. 

Hannibal takes on Gaines with a modified water truck, firing on him and then holding him at gunpoint. The Colonel makes it clear that unless the veterans are left alone, Amy’s photos will very quickly find their way to the newspapers.

With everything wrapped up, the team celebrate with a drink in the hotel. BA’s on the milk and Murdock says he and his associates (who live in his utility belt) don’t drink. While Hannibal thinks he’s displaying the “sign of a true leader”, BA thinks it’s more like “the sign of a true nut”. Freeze frame.

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Let’s wrap up with a few key questions.

Does Hannibal wear a disguise?

Yes. He’s a very convincing orderly at the VA hospital.

Does BA get on a plane?

No, but his van gets a window and tyre shot out so it’s still not his day.

Should someone be dead?

No. There’s some gunplay but the hose battle at the end is decidedly non-lethal.

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Water, Water Everywhere is a middle-of-the-road episode of The A-Team. It’s testament to the show’s quality that even a middling adventure is as entertaining as this. Setting handicapped veterans against a wealthy landowner is another classic underdog story but it’s the enduring threat of Gaines’ that keeps this one alive. Despite the usual defeats to the team, it’s clear he isn’t going to be beaten easily – he has the money and the patience to get what he wants.

The high-power hose battle at the end is very similar to the recent cabbage canon finale, but not as interesting. It’s always hard to suspend disbelief whenever villains lose to water. Everyone’s on good form though, Hannibal is on the jazz, BA gets some special lines dealing with Murdock and Face even drops the ball wooing a new lady.